Spring 2008 Issue > Intercultural Tips
Intercultural Tips
I Don’t Get It and I Want to Go Home!
If you are an Expat, then you may find yourself saying “I don’t get it!” or “Is this for real?” Do you ever come home from a (seemingly) easy trip to the grocery store only to find yourself completely exhausted and wanting to go back to bed? Do you find yourself feeling out of sorts and thinking “this behavior is not me?” Well, this is culture shock my friends!
Camilla and her expat friends exploring
the outskirts of Manila
Camilla Brooks was born in England, and raised and educated in the United States. She has an Undergraduate degree in East Asian Studies and a Graduate in Non Profit Management, with a focus on International Development. She speaks Cebuano, a language in the southern Philippines and Mandarin. Camilla has lived in Taiwan and has been living in the Philippines for five years. She worked in corporate services for Crown and was recently promoted to the role of country manager. Camilla shares some of the “culture shock” she has experienced in Manila.
Culture Shock
Culture has often been compared with an iceberg, 15% of which is visible, with the majority lying concealed below the surface. Obvious manifestations of the culture are the clothes people wear, the language that they speak and the food that they eat. But lurking underneath the observable is that which is harder to navigate around; the beliefs, expectations and values of a culture.
Expats in the Philippines typically underestimate culture shock. To contrast, upon arrival in China, expats are immediately assaulted with obvious, observable differences in the language and food; they therefore come to expect, and brace themselves for, the shock of living in a different culture. However, upon arrival in the Philippines, there are not as many observable differences. Most people see Western staples like Starbucks®, for example, talk to the shopkeepers in English and subconsciously assume that the culture here is similar to that of their home country (if they are from the West).
But, once a foreigner settles here, they begin to interact more deeply in the culture and face the nuances of the Filipino lifestyle; aspects of which, when unrecognized or misunderstood, can be overwhelming, awkward and lethal to an overseas assignment. Culture shock affects everyone, the most seasoned international traveler and even Filipinos returning home from abroad. It is defined as an abrupt loss of the familiar and is characterized by feelings of awkwardness, frustration, isolation and most notably, a “crisis of confidence” as one no longer knows how to handle certain, usually routine, situations.
The best way to handle culture shock is to recognize it, accept it and focus on moving through it. Depending on the degree of variance between one’s own culture and the new culture, certain stages may be elongated and others abbreviated. Everyone is different, and everyone will feel the effects of culture shock differently. In any case, people should be forgiving of themselves. Adjusting to a new country is a very challenging time.
Some personal experiences...
Camilla, with her goddaughter
and her goddaughter’s mother
While dining at an outdoor restaurant, I was having a problem with mosquitoes and asked the waiter if they had any repellent (which restaurants usually provide). After some time, the waiter returned and despite behaving a bit oddly, sprayed something under the table. I focused a bit more on the can, out of curiosity, and wouldn’t you know it...he was spraying furniture cleaner. This is very typical of Filipino “non-confrontational behavior” as he did not want to disappoint me.
In Taglish (a combination of Tagalog and English), a well known phrase is “out of stock.” What it means is that if you are silly enough to ask a store clerk for a certain product, and he is not able to find it in the aisle, even though it could be in the back storeroom, he will not offer to check or to find an alternative. He will probably just say “out of stock.” A seasoned Manila expat would say “Could you look in the back?”
When my father was choosing a color to paint his new apartment, he was considering salmon pink. When he met the previous owner, he noticed that her shirt was the exact color that he wanted. He asked her to stand by the wall so he could check the color. The next day, when he arrived at the apartment, he found the exact salmon shirt, which had been washed and ironed, with a note that said “in case you need something to bring to the paint store.” This is a true reflection of the Filipino hospitality.
Tips for Newcomers
When you first arrive, you will probably feel excited and full of hope.
Harness this energy! Explore and join as many groups as you can to build your personal support network –expat nationality groups are a great way to meet people!
After a while you may begin to feel homesick, as if everything is problematic and that minor misunderstandings seem larger than they really are.
Do not stay at home! Surround yourself with positive friends and try to be realistic about yourself and your new country. Find places and set routines that work for you personally. If you want a chocolate bar, have one.
After a while, the culture becomes more familiar, routines are established and comforts are identified.
Rejoice in finally “getting it!” Find ways to share your new found wisdom–help other newcomers to the country. Explore the region and do some traveling.
Eventually, you will feel at home, have a deeper understanding of the culture and begin to laugh and smile again.
Remember that you may still have some bad days. I have been here five years and I still have plenty of “Manila Moments!”
Crown Relocations: Intercultural Services
Crown Relocations provides intercultural training for employees who are preparing for international assignments. Customized training programs have been designed to support international assignees throughout the assignment cycle, from departure, through the assignment and to eventual repatriation. For more information, choose “Find a Crown Office” from the home page of Crown’s website, www.crownrelo.com.